Short Takes: nerd jokes and riddles
As Copy Chief, I expend most of my efforts on the behind-the-scenes portion of this publication. However, as a special treat for our final issue this semester, I am gracing you with some of my highly developed humor. Want to share a joke with me? Look for the girl in the “Team Oxford Comma” shirt.
The personified comma
A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.
A mole of chemistry humor
Two electrons walk into a bar. One says, “I think I’ve lost an electron.” The other questions, “Are you sure?” The first replies, “I’m positive!”
Never order a drink after a chemist
Two chemists walk into a bar. One says, “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says, “I’ll have some H2O, too.” Unfortunately, he died.
The importance of a comma
“Let’s eat Grandma!” This truly means you want to eat your dear granny. How sad, but maybe she tastes delicious.
“Let’s eat, Grandma.” Maybe she baked delicious pies.
The sad side of Christmas
Q: What do you call Santa’s helpers?
A: Subordinate clauses.
Riddle me this
Q: Behead this beast and you will find, a larger beast is left behind. Behead this larger beast and then, instead of one, you will find ten.
A: Fox (Behead (meaning remove the first letter) ‘fox’ and you are left with ‘ox,’ and behead ‘ox’ and you are left with ‘X,’ the Roman Numeral for ten.)
Perhaps the funniest joke I have ever come up with